Episode 708
by Cristae“W-what are you doing? Didn’t you say double membership is allowed?”
Ahsan asked, flustered.
Sure, the seniors had added, “The club chooses its members,” and “It’ll never happen,” but it was still the seniors who’d said double membership was possible.
How could they act so aggressively now, as if they wanted to destroy the kitchen club application by force?
“I said double membership was allowed,” said Severius of the Library Club, nodding easily at Ahsan’s remark. “But isn’t it a lot better if we get you focused on just one club?”
“Severius is right. Let’s destroy it and talk. Priest Falkrius! Come here! Let’s have a chat!”
But the kitchen club students inside the storeroom didn’t open up.
Instead, mocking sounds echoed back.
-Fuhuhu, why should I talk to you?
“Damn. They caught on. Attack!”
“Kitchen club guys are always so sharp—how annoying!”
The seniors gritted their teeth and raised their wands.
Because they stored so many ingredients, the kitchen club was one of the clubs most attacked by other students. Their experience with raids was on another level.
“Spirit, infiltrate!”
A senior cast an out-of-body spell to try and sneak a spirit into the kitchen storeroom.
It’s a spell often used as a prelude to illusion magic—once you link to the target’s soul, it’s easy to initiate various powerful illusions.
“The power of the Yang protects!”
Priest Falkrius incanted in a stentorian voice.
Wild bursts of magic crackled over the battered warehouse’s walls, forging a thick shield.
The seniors cursed at the sight.
“Damn, the defense just got even stronger!”
“When did they reinforce it?!”
“…At the end of last year, we did,” muttered a Mason Club senior sheepishly, prompting a hail of rebukes.
“You idiot, all you care about is gold, huh? The kitchen club was already half a fortress—how are we supposed to rob it now!”
“If you designed it, you’d better spill the weak points! Where are they?!”
“I forgot! Would you leave vulnerabilities if you were the contractor?”
Everyone clicked their tongues.
They’d likely used spells to forget the weak points after finishing the job.
Severius spat and said,
“Doesn’t matter. We’ll break it down by brute force. If the cauldron won’t boil, let’s see what does!”
“That’s right. Falkrius! You think the Mason Club can’t break what the Mason Club built? Get out here—let’s negotiate properly!”
-Hahaha, try it! Lotta ingredients for the pot today! The application’s safe in my hand anyway!
Falkrius, overhearing from inside, mocked them.
Now the seniors were truly enraged.
“We’ll kill you!”
“You thieving bastards. Time to settle all old scores!”
Boom! Crack-BOOM!
A makeshift siege broke out, with magical attacks flying over storerooms, tents, and cauldrons.
The door of the weakest storeroom got wobbly and turned into a malicious spirit.
The kitchen club’s mages responded at once, binding the ghost in a powerful petrification spell and turning it to stone.
Next, the stone transformed into a golem. The crowd whistled at Severius, who’d done it.
-UWAAAAA!
Falkrius swung his ladle, which transformed into a gigantic mace, and smashed the golem.
“How much did you dope up?!”
“Block their potions! They could hold out for a week on elixirs alone!”
When the seniors worked together and chanted, results showed instantly.
Kitchen club mages detected it at once: precious potions in the storeroom and around their waists were decaying, corroding.
“Just turn them to lead! We’ll fix it later!”
“Yes!”
“Fuhaha, if you want to show off your power, I’ll oblige! Let’s settle this with STRENGTH!”
Radiating a rainbow aura from overlapping potion effects, Falkrius charged. The seniors stood their ground.
“Bring it on, Falkrius!”
“Whoever wins, gets the application!”
One senior began merging with the ground to become a giant rock monster. Perse, feeling things might spin out of control, shouted to the juniors:
“For today, let’s break up! The other clubs not here will find you and give their pitch sometime this week anyway!”
“Understood!”
“Anyone thinking of joining polo right now?”
“……”
Sneaking in that question during the retreat, Perse got a look of contempt from the second-years.
He avoided their gaze, embarrassed.
“Just in case anyone was interested…”
-Avoid the seventh floor for a while. Club war in progress.
↳Which clubs?
↳Official ones, apparently.
↳What, did their subsidies get cut or something?
“……”
“……”
Reading the bulletin, Lee Han’s friends tried to comfort him.
“Don’t be so depressed, Wardanaz.”
“Yeah. Come on, look on the bright side. The seniors might fight over you and just give up.”
“!”
Lee Han hadn’t really hoped for that, but now he was intrigued.
“That could happen.”
“Seriously?”
Gainando cocked his head.
If ten people fought over a chocolate cake, sure, they’d all get tired, but wouldn’t they just split it in the end? Nobody gives up the cake!
“Someone keep him quiet.”
“Mmph! Why! What did I say wrong!”
His friends clamped Gainando’s mouth shut, worried Lee Han might hear.
“See ya, Wardanaz. I need to head off for a lecture.”
“What is it?”
“-The Most Comfortable Positions for Rest-.”
“…Didn’t that course vanish ten years ago?”
“It might be back this year!”
“…All right then.”
With hope in his friend’s eyes, Lee Han couldn’t say any more.
After all, sometimes a missing professor popped up and a lost class would revive.
‘I should get going, too.’
The first week was for club introductions, but lectures did start.
Especially from second year, it was the student’s job to check which of the many available classes were real.
‘Lectures…’
He checked his schedule.
Since his timetable was (arbitrarily) made by Yukveltire and the professors, there were unlikely to be many that didn’t exist.
‘What’s this?’
As he scanned the class list, Lee Han spotted something odd.
A course not on the faculty-required timetable, but recommended on Yukveltire’s—“On the Understanding of Extremely Difficult and Arcane Esoteric Magic (If you’re not confident, don’t come).”
“…?”
Others might disagree, but Lee Han always had the freedom to pick some classes.
Even the professor-packed mandatory schedule had a tiny gap or two.
Yukveltire’s calendar kindly filled those, but Lee Han still had a say.
But to recommend a class like that for one of those precious slots…
‘Hm. Direte did say that artifact was extraordinary…’
He remembered Direte praising Yukveltire’s huge clock artifact, saying some students risked getting ambushed by rivals to obtain it.
With a recommendation like that, there had to be a reason.
Still…
‘The name is just so weird.’
The title seemed intentionally written to imply: “If you take this, you brought suffering on yourself.”
Lee Han, burned last year by picking an easy-looking class that turned out to be a nightmare, was wary.
“…I’ll be careful, but I’ll go.”
He wouldn’t ignore the recommendation completely, so he set out.
If it was Professor Voladi behind the door, he’d turn right back around.
Creak—
Lee Han opened the farthest, most remote classroom on the third floor and hesitated—the room looked untouched for over a decade.
‘At least it’s not Professor Baegrek.’
If it were Voladi, he’d be standing like a statue at the center from the start.
But here, there wasn’t even a trace of people.
Lee Han relaxed a bit, brushed off dust, and sat down.
A few moments passed.
‘…Is no one else coming?’
He was a bit confused.
Even if not his year, surely a third- or fourth-year senior might show up.
For no one to pick such a rare class—why?
He was about to leave when the door opened.
Creak—
Through the crack, Professor Garcia peered in.
When he saw the room empty, he almost turned away—then stopped.
“Ah. Lee Han?”
“Hello, Professor.”
“Did you find the wrong classroom?”
“Uh…”
Lee Han double-checked.
“‘On the Understanding of Extremely Difficult and Arcane Esoteric Magic (If you’re not confident, don’t come).’ This one?”
“…You came because you were curious after seeing a title like that?!”
Professor Garcia looked at Lee Han as if he couldn’t believe it.
He’d never bought the skeleton principal’s “smear campaign,” but now even he had to admit—Wardanaz might be a student who intentionally sought out hard classes.
Why would anyone attend a class with a name like that?
“My senior recommended it.”
“Which son of a… Oh. The calendar?”
Garcia quickly put two and two together.
The infamous Blue Dragon Tower artifact students fought over for its efficient course selection.
“Yes. You know it?”
“Yukveltire is famous… Wait, it recommended this?!”
“Yes.”
“……”
For a long time, Garcia seemed at a loss for words.
“Professor?”
“Uh… I… Why did it suggest this…?”
The professor heaved a deep sigh and stepped fully into the room.
And finished the explanation.
“I’m actually the one teaching this course, Lee Han.”
“!”
Lee Han was shocked.
Not just that Garcia was teaching it, but—
“You picked that crazy title for it?!”
“I had my reasons!”
Embarrassed, Garcia flushed a little.
“It’s really tough stuff. I didn’t want students to sign up unless they meant it.”
“Professor…!”
Lee Han was moved.
Surely the evil skeleton principal had ordered, “Garcia, you must torment the students with this class!”
Reluctantly, Garcia opened the course, but to save the students, he’d chosen a title so nobody would sign up.
‘How moving…’
Only pity, that he himself had shown up.
“What sort of magic is it?”
“Time magic.”
“Oh.”
“Are you interested in time magic, Lee Han?”
Seeing Lee Han’s odd reaction, Garcia looked curious, as if there was something else on his mind.
“Over break, I got this clock—”
“AAAAAAAH!”
Garcia snatched the pocket watch from Lee Han’s hands and hurled it at the wall.
THUD!
With a crash, the watch punched a hole straight through the wall and shot down the hallway.