Famine 81: Humbug Cannon

[Mistworld – Day 10 / Midnight 00:00 / Forest Onsen Pavilion / Current Farm Completion: 51%]
[5 days until the “Eye of the Supreme God” event]

Clang—clang—

After the chime faded, the little shrine maiden’s ghostly voice drifted beside Si Yan’s ear.

[The first day of business at the Onsen Festival Hall… has ended…]
[The total number of smiles collected today is… 935.]

A decent harvest. Si Yan nodded slightly.

All three hundred rooms had been fully booked on the first day, with an average occupancy of two to three players per room. Excluding those naturally inclined to smile, a total of 512 smiles were gathered.

[Side Quest – The Shrine Maiden’s Promise: Collect 5,000 smiles at the Tenman Shrine Onsen Festival Hall. Current Progress: 935/5000.]
[Milestone Check: Reach at least 50% progress before the Eye’s revenge arrives, or the quest will be marked as failed.]

It was worth noting that many players had requested to cram a dozen people into a single room. Si Yan had Yun Zhong politely decline—after all, the first phase of the onsen only had a few pools, and too many people would ruin the tranquil experience the Forest Onsen Pavilion was meant to offer, making it a loss rather than a gain.

At this rate, as long as things proceeded methodically, this side quest could be completed very soon.

With this hurdle overcome, Si Yan was in high spirits.

As for expanding the onsen, there was no immediate need. With a daily capacity of 500 guests, the current clientele of three thousand players was well served.
In the early days after opening, business would naturally be more enthusiastic, but after guests had experienced the baths, the daily flow would level off into a stable, reasonable number.

Operating the onsen each day required the system’s cleaning and maintenance, repairs for wear and tear, and labor costs, amounting to 10,000 points daily.

Yet the revenue easily topped ten times that.

Three hundred rooms brought in 90,000 points, plus extra tickets for the milk bath and miscellaneous streams of additional income. Adding it all together, the Forest Onsen Pavilion was now contributing a daily turnover of 120,000 points to the farm.

The income was quite satisfactory.

As things stood, the farm’s current savings had reached 1.23 million points.
After deducting operational costs, daily profit stood at 270,000 points.

With five days remaining till the Eye’s incursion, and some reserves set aside for emergencies, Si Yan estimated he still had a budget of around two million points to invest in defenses.

Si Yan nodded in satisfaction.

Suddenly, he felt a small tug at the corner of his coat.

Looking down, it was none other than the little shrine maiden.

She stood beside him, her puppet head still damp, tilting up to look at him, gently tugging at the hem of his trench coat.
The eerie little shrine maiden opened and closed her mouth with a clattering motion, then softly spoke:

[…Thank you, Master of the Pavilion.]

Si Yan couldn’t help but laugh. He reached out and patted her head.

The little shrine maiden seemed not to understand what that meant, but slightly inclined her head and gave Si Yan a bow.

With a flash of white light, the shrine maiden puppet vanished.
Where she had stood, she left behind a small milk bottle.

[Aunt Qiniang is very happy.]
[This is her token of gratitude, entrusted to you through me.]

Aunt Qiniang? Was that the name of the cow who birthed the spring? Si Yan stooped to pick up the milk bottle, examining it carefully.

[The Cow’s Gratitude]
You helped a flustered mother reunite with her lost child, restoring peace to their family bond. This is the thanks you deserve.

Effect: Contains 500ml of fresh cow’s milk. Using a single milliliter drop as the center, it generates a 5-cubic-meter [Tenman Divine Protection Aura] in a shape of your choosing, lasting for 24 hours.
[Tenman Divine Protection Aura]: For its duration, all friendly units within the aura receive S-rank divine guardian protection—20% damage reduction and complete immunity to all negative effects.
You are such a good soul—the world itself wishes to see you live on.

Not bad at all! Si Yan’s eyes lit up.

The farm had already grown to the size of a small settlement. It seemed to be assumed that by this stage, thousands upon thousands of players would reside here, and the items available in the store had evolved into large-scale, group-use facilities, with their prices soaring far above what they had been back in the humble farmhouse days.

With over a million points, you could hardly buy anything of real value the normal way.

Thus, Si Yan had no choice but to enact a new strategy—

Survey the entire shop, and seek out as many defective goods as possible.
Each of these had enormous shortcomings, making them cheap, but also possessed unique, outstanding strengths. If used judiciously, they could still produce excellent results.

The [Starship Cola Railgun] was a prime example.

Si Yan, having studied the shop thoroughly, swiftly opened the panel and scrolled through with practiced fingers, soon landing on his target.

Ding! Purchase complete. With a flick of his finger, an entire row of “machines” appeared, each taller than a man, complicated in structure and looking quite imposing—if you ignored the fact they were entirely assembled from stiff cardboard, askew, with glue seams still sparking and fizzling, causing one to worry they might spontaneously combust at any moment.

[B-Rank Artificial Facility—Bamboozle Master’s Machine Cannon]

There once was a lord who spent a fortune to hire Engineer Hammond to build him weapons.
Over the allotted months, came these progress reports:

“Production is proceeding smoothly.”
“Ammunition is on its way.”
“Indeed, mass production is a logical need.”
“The rapid-fire mechanism is being refined, I’m on it.”
…………
……

In the end, the day before delivery, Hammond finally created a new folder.
No matter—he was ready to bamboozle the client!

Effect: The Bamboozle Machine Cannon behaves just like a real automatic cannon in battle! It has a rate of fire of 600 rounds per minute, a main gun powerful enough to cut a person in half, a high-capacity 2,333-round magazine, just one minute of cooldown for excellent sustained performance… and an aiming system that’s a bit slapdash, but nothing unsightly.
As long as you don’t raise your city walls, no one need ever know there were never any real cannons here.

Special Note: If anyone approaches within five meters of the Bamboozle Cannon, its true nature will be instantly revealed, and it will immediately lose all combat effectiveness.

Since Si Yan was standing on the wall, all the cardboard cannons within five meters had gone slack and out of action, their paper-mâché barrels drooping dejectedly.

Si Yan tried pouring a drop of milk onto one of the cardboard cannons.

Ding!

The cardboard barrel snapped upright, full of vitality once more.

It was night, with the woods outside empty, and the Cola Lake glimmered in the mist.
Si Yan grabbed the handle, aimed at Cola Lake, and tried a controlled burst. Immediately, a great spray of water erupted.

The power was impressive—no doubt about it.

Si Yan had reviewed the whole shop, and the other weapons designed by this “Hammond” were each priced in the millions, even tens of millions—though, being mass-producible high-tech armaments from a superior civilization, that wasn’t unreasonable.

The low price of the Bamboozle Cannon was due entirely to its restriction on proximity—no allies, no foes, could be nearby. It was entirely dependent on its shoddy automatic targeting… which, as anyone could guess, was not exactly reliable.

However, with the [Tenman Divine Protection Aura], all these issues vanished.

To buy such an item for 750,000 points was most satisfactory for Si Yan.

That 500ml bottle of thankful milk, used sparingly, would just about be enough for the entire battery of cannons—enough to last through the Eye’s assault.
But only just. Si Yan couldn’t even let the Chun Cao Mercenary Group practice aiming ahead of time.

As for more milk…
At that thought, Si Yan’s gaze darkened.

Even without using it on the Bamboozle Cannon, this milk was an extraordinary treasure.

If enough people were to disregard a certain rule, he could get more of this milk.
Or he could “invite” some lawbreakers to the pools… and force-feed them the tomato broth…

This path lay clearly before Si Yan.

He bowed his head, massaging his brow.

Of course, he could never actually consider such a thing. If he really did, how would he be any different from Chen Chunsheng?

Still, it must be said, when even your own survival couldn’t be guaranteed, things like this were terribly tempting.

He wasn’t sure if it was just his imagination, but it seemed that this world constantly lured people to certain acts—to sacrifice their companions in exchange for power.

The Onsen Festival Hall was such a place, as was the primal hot spring…

When this side quest was finally complete, he’d speak with the little shrine maiden again.
Si Yan had a feeling there was a story to that child.

When the next morning came, Si Yan went to the icefield to find Nidhogg.

With the magic circle repaired by the North Team, he brought the evil dragon along.

“Ohh… this is the blood array? Its completion is impressive—how did you bring it over?”
High overhead, Nidhogg beat his wings, looking down with interest at the crimson array below.

“No matter, it’s of no concern to me. I’ll take this array now.”

These past days, Nidhogg had almost never stopped fighting. His body was covered in bloody wounds and bandages, but he seemed careless about them, lazily waving his massive wings, his voice languid as ever:
“Still remember our deal? You get to ask me one question.”
“Boss, have you decided what to ask?”

Si Yan exhaled softly.

Truth be told, he hadn’t.

Nidhogg was wrapped in so many mysteries.

Why was he not on the Chosen Ones’ rankings, yet remained the primary candidate of the Supreme God?
What did he mean when he told Shi He, “Our fate lasts only eight years?” How did he know the date of the Famine Game’s arrival?
He said he had met Si Yan before—but when, where, and under what circumstances?
Who, exactly, had he been in the past?
……

Each of these questions was crucial, which paradoxically made picking one all the harder.

Si Yan simply knew too little to judge which was most important, no matter how long he pondered.

A frustrating predicament. Si Yan frowned.

“Hey…”

Suddenly, Nidhogg laughed.
“Can’t make up your mind?” he said.

Si Yan stared at him impassively.

“Ah, don’t glare at me like that.” Nidhogg raised his hands, grinning broadly.

Then, he lobbed a bombshell:
“Have you been targeted by the [Eye], and are now facing quite a big problem?”

—!
It took Si Yan considerable effort to keep his face under control.

On the very first day of this world’s arrival, the farm had been scrutinized by the [Eye]. But when he asked others, it seemed the Eye sometimes descended for close observation of settlements—though even ferries like Bone Crossing had been viewed only a few times.

How did Nidhogg know?!

Nidhogg slapped his thigh, laughing exuberantly: “Aha! You’ve got one more question to be curious about now!”

Si Yan: “…”

Hold back—just don’t punch him.
Not that he’d win anyway.

But soon, Nidhogg’s laughter faded, his tone sobering.

“Boss…” he said. “You really are… brave, I’ll give you that.”
“I have no idea what you did, but to have the [Eye] pay special attention to you—to distinguish you out of the entire world—that’s quite the feat.”

“Getting into such a mess is a kind of talent, too.”

“Thanks,” Si Yan replied politely. “You’ve been plenty of help as well.”

Nidhogg’s mouth twitched, and his wingbeats faltered.

“…Ahem.” Nidhogg coughed lightly and continued: “Anyway—my point is, if you can’t decide, maybe ask me after you fend off the [Eye].”
“Maybe by then, you’ll have gained a better, more pressing question—who knows.”

At that, Nidhogg let out a deep sigh.

This time, there was, at last, a flash of true respect in the evil dragon’s tone.
No matter how many jokes or sarcasms he used to cover it, Si Yan detected it instantly.

“To draw the Eye’s attention is no pleasant fate. I doubt I can be of much help—if I appear by your farm, the Eye’s assault may multiply hundreds or thousands of times… which would do you no good.”

“But when the need arises, I’ll lend what help I can—my way.”

“…”
Nidhogg touched his neck, eyes cast down. He laughed quietly.
“Don’t get killed, boss.”

Si Yan mulled this over a moment, understanding that this was an oblique expression of concern.

“I won’t.” Si Yan replied steadily. It sounded less a promise than a simple statement of fact. “I will live.”

……
…

[Mistworld – Day 10 / Noon 12:00 / Farm / Current Completion: 51%]
[5 days until the Eye of the Supreme God arrives]

After that, Si Yan returned to the farm.

He didn’t announce the news to anyone—but word spread nonetheless: in five days, a great catastrophe would strike, and from top to bottom, the entire farm would need to assume a state of emergency.

Si Yan did not disclose the specific details of the coming disaster, but he spelled out its dangers frankly and without concealment.

After the shock wore off, the players swiftly accepted this.

Perhaps after surviving so long in the Famine Game, everyone had grown used to sudden crises crashing down on their heads.

Before the farm, this was how every single day had been.

Service players, combat players… everyone organized into teams, under the direction of Li Cui’e and others, throwing themselves into all-out preparations. Following Si Yan’s guidance, many defensive structures were erected.
Meanwhile, Si Yan, after careful selection, purchased many defensive items for the fortress.

During this time, all the farm’s facilities continued to function in an orderly manner, generating 270,000 per day. Soon, the shrine maiden’s promise was fulfilled, as was the new population requirement of 2,000 more guests, all without incident.

[Main Quest IV: Survive]
[Quest Objectives:]
[1. Recruit 2,000 new Famine Voters for the farm.]
[2. Collect at least one new Terrain Bait to unlock a new biome and increase farm completion to 61%.]
[3. Survive the first round of retaliation from the Eye of the Supreme God. Countdown: 15 days.]
[Time Limit: 15 days]
[Failure Penalty: Total Obliteration]

Only the final objective remained.

The grass-cutting machine still had about 60% energy left. In Si Yan’s mind, Bian Xu’s projection was still smiling at him. They seemed to be strangers, and yet infinitely familiar—the countless words unspoken condensed into the last line of the mission:

[No matter life or death, success or failure—I will always be with you.]

Five days passed in a flash.

Very soon, the fifteenth day in Mistworld… would arrive.